Kirill: This is FiveMinuteFriday, Who You Become.
Kirill: Welcome back to the SuperDataScience podcast ladies and gentlemen, super excited to have you on the show. And today here I’ve got a very special guest, Marc Sarfati, AI engineer working with Bluelife. Marc, how are you going?
Marc: I’m doing great. Thank you for the invitation.
Kirill: Awesome. Very, very excited to have you on the podcast. Third time now. Um, it was so funny how we recorded that long episode just now.
Marc: Yeah.
Kirill: Very excited. But before we continue on this topic, let’s quickly introduce Bluelife. Bluelife is an AI consulting firm that provides solutions to businesses who want to leverage artificial intelligence to make massive profits at no upfront cost. So that’s what we’re all about. So we’re passionate about AI and what I was mentioning is that we just recorded a long episode with Marc, which is going to go live at the end of October, somewhere on 24th October. So if you want to check it out then you get to know Marc a bit better there. But today we are talking about an interesting topic. So I wanted to discuss with you a quote that I heard recently, that “in life, it’s not about the destination, but it’s about whom you need to become in order to get there”. So what are your thoughts on that?
Marc: I really like it and I also would like to add something. I think I heard a very similar quote, which is basically it’s not about what you have achieved, but who you have become. Which is quite similar but a bit different and I really like both of them because it means basically even if you chase something, a goal of yours that you want to, something you want to achieve, in the end, what remains here is yourself and who you have become through this process. And, like most of the time when you look back, the actual value you got from this is not the thing that you reached, but how it shapes you and how you changed yourself.
Kirill: Yeah. Wow, that’s exactly it. It’s what you get to keep, right? Everything else can be stripped away.
Marc: Exactly.
Kirill: Lost, taken away. But who you’ve become remains you. So how does somebody keep focused on that? It’s so easy to get lost in wanting things, wanting, I don’t know, money, cars, jobs even, you know, like even noble things like helping people wanting to go and donate blood or something like that. Like you want to go and do that. You want to make that contribution or accomplishment or I don’t know, go and play a sport or even connect with somebody. But in reality, in all those situations, whether they might seem a little bit ambitious and maybe somebody like put more focus on the wrong things or if they’re even noble. In all those cases, it’s about who you become in the journey. How do you keep that in mind at all times?
Marc: What I like to do is spending… I try every year at least a week or two, spending just me, myself and I, you know, without any outside distraction, just myself and reflecting on me basically. And you realize that actually like the, especially the material things like the physical things don’t really matter. Like whatever the situation you’re in, you’re still the center of your, like in your own vision and your referential, you’re the center of your system basically. So basically focusing on who you are and like realizing that actually most of the things you’re chasing don’t really matter, makes you focus on who you want to be as a person rather than what do you want to have.
Kirill: Hmm. Wow, so you do this once a year? Is this every-
Marc: I try to, I mean I like doing this on regular basis anyways, just spend like reflecting myself. But last year I went to Mexico for a couple of weeks and especially, I was in one island, which had a very poor connection, like a phone connection and it really allowed me to spend… It allows you to spend some time with yourself and basically realizing what are your values, what you have achieved and how it changed you and what was important to you and what was not.
Kirill: Interesting. Okay. And so you see the progression from year to year?
Marc: Oh yes.
Kirill: Mhm. Are you always happy with the progression?
Marc: Yes. I have, something we chatted with a friend recently is like, it’s been, I don’t know how many years, but every time in New Years I try to basically like I rewind all the year that happened and it’s been many years. I thought damn, this past year was the best one I’ve ever had. And every year it keeps being the best year I’ve ever had.
Kirill: Wow, that’s great. That’s a great way to live. Okay, cool. So self-reflection important point to recognize that you see who you’re becoming along the way of your life. And then on the other hand, like that’s retrospective. How do you now anticipate or set intentions on who you want to become?
Marc: I like writing down things I want a lot. Basically sitting alone and taking, not to computer, but just pen and paper and writing things.
Kirill: Did you know Hadelin writes on pen and paper like once a year?
Marc: Oh really?
Kirill: When he needs to sign a document, it’s so hard to get him to write on pen and paper.
Marc: At some point, like a few years ago, I was writing mostly on my computer, but now I enjoy, I think it’s more powerful and more solid.
Kirill: Something yeah, something about it. It’s not the same, right?
Marc: They say that it activates basically more neural pathways in your brain, like writing activates, many, many, many more neural pathways in your brain than typing on a computer.
Kirill: Okay. Gotcha. So you write down what you want, whom you want to become?
Marc: Yeah. And sometimes I can feel a bit down, a bit off, so I just sit down and write what’s in my head. And usually just the fact of writing it like allows you to get it out of your brain and out of your mind.
Kirill: That’s very cool. That’s very cool. Okay, so you write it down, but how do you choose though, who do you want to become? Because there’s so many ways you can develop. You can become kinder, you can become stronger, more empathetic.
Marc: Why not all of them? I mean, you want achieve them all like in the next five months. Why not all of them?
Kirill: That’s a good point. Yeah. And I guess you’ll write down the ones first anyway that stand out the most to that you need to work on. Okay. Okay. Have you ever done things that you feel you will not like who you become for doing them?
Marc: I don’t think so.
Kirill: So you use that as like a judgment of whether you want to do something or not?
Marc: Yeah, I mean usually I try to… I have goals and dreams, like a direction I want to go towards and my actions are usually in line with this direction. Of course you make mistakes, but no big mistakes, any mistake can be fixed. And as long as you’re facing the right direction, I think just enjoy the walk.
Kirill: And I think that’s important thing that mistakes also teach you.
Marc: A lot.
Kirill: And in the same way that you become, even though it might be painful or you might not like what you have done. Not be happy with yourself for doing it, but as long as you reflect on it, it’s teaching you something.
Marc: Yes and I’m really into rap. Yeah. And I got many, many lessons from rap and one sentence I like is “There are no mistakes. Just lessons”. Like something’s not bad if you don’t make it bad. You have good experiences, they are great. And bad experiences, just take out the lesson from this and throw the rest. You don’t need to focus on the negative. Just learn what’s useful. There is like, it makes me think of a sentence I truly love. It’s “Absorb what is useful, disregard what is useless and add what is uniquely yours”.
Kirill: Wow. Absorb what is useful, disregard what is useless and add what is uniquely yours. Yeah. Very cool. Very cool. What’s unique to you?
Marc: I don’t know. When you learn, it’s hard to say like something that is uniquely me, but when you learn something, you make links and connection with things you have learned before that the teacher might not know because it hasn’t happened in his or her life.
Kirill: Yeah.
Marc: But this is something you add like a connection to something you have learned or lived or experienced before.
Kirill: Gotcha. That’s very cool. Very cool. And I also liked that thing you said before about choosing the best perspective, right? Choosing the best thought out of the ones available to you. How did it go again?
Marc: So yeah, basically we were chatting, discussing this offline, it’s “Always choose the best thought that is available to you”.
Kirill: And in any situation.
Marc: Yes.
Kirill: And that’s different to being delusional.
Marc: Yes. Exactly, because I’m not saying always think the best thought. Like everything is bliss, everything is perfect. Sometimes situation everything’s not perfect. But instead of focusing on the negative, et cetera, just choose the best thought that is available to you and once you have focused on this, like usually the, your headspace gets better and you have access to even better thoughts, et cetera.
Kirill: Fantastic. Yeah, totally agree. Headspace is so important and the thoughts you have, and this is a good little segue or preview for our episode that we recorded, the long one. So if anybody listening wants to learn more or hear more about headspace and thoughts and things like that, and of course, Marc’s background, don’t forget to check out episodes 307, that’s going to come out at the end of October. We’ll be chatting with Marc for a while there. On that note, we should wrap up. This was one of the short ones. Thanks Marc for coming.
Marc: Thank you very much.
